London: Guesstemation = 1 week till im bankrupt

Swiss Air was the greatest experience of my life. After being starved to death by United I nearly cried when i came across my own tv screen, food, swiss chocolate and constant smiling people with German accents. Yes please.
I thoroughly enjoyed my one hour in Switzerland, sitting by myself, snot running constantly down my nose and my head in a book. Apparently it was minus 6 outside and all the mountains and sky were white. We flew over Paris as well but I was on the wrong side of the plane so missed it.
After being given the third reich by UK security I was finally allowed through the gates. However the man wanted to know exactly how much money I had, why exactly I planned on staying for five months without a visa and what the rest of my trip was going to involve. I thought I was going to end up on the UK version of Border Security. At least rebecca would've been proud.
My next challenge was getting my bag on my back.. which is seriously now impossible without a boost from a nearby bench or trolley. Forgetting that my tripod was attatched to the top of my bag, I created a metal sling shot that went straight for my head, multiple times because I was too handicapped by my bag to fix it.
Following signs to the Underground I managed to get the RIGHT train, in the RIGHT direction. Amazing. Two punk kids clad in leather thought I was hilarious with my oversized bag that seems now to ride me like a fucking bull. I just glared at them.
The £7 cab ride to Dylans took me through what looked like the set of where Harry Potter lives. All the houses are the same and in perfect winding rows, the sky is grey and the pavement is cobbled. It is actually colder than New York. Welcome back chillas.
Im now in a state of delerium after not sleeping for over 24hrs and am sitting in a lounge room full of boys from Australia, and the lone man from Ireland. If you concentrate really hard you can understand what he's saying. Sometimes.
The house is like a bigger version of our uni dorm: decorations are items stolen from pubs or around the streets and there's a designated corner for posters of nude women, all amazingly 'signed' by the girls, to the boys of this house.
The guys here are super nice and keep trying to feed us and offer us beer. I actually don't know how many live here.. it's getting a reputation for being a half way house, boasting over 50 straglers passing through in the past year.

Jess & I are currently the only girls here, Miss Tully Anne Smyth arrives tomorrow morning bright and early. Updates are on their way..

Goodbye NYC (crying)

So im leaving for Zurich in 2hrs.
Slightly worried about a few things..
That I'll get lost somewhere in Switzerland taking a red bus tour in my one hour stop over.. that my phone will die and i wont be able to contact anyone.. that I don't speak German.. and that I have no swiss money. If there is such a thing.
So sad to leave NY and sab's apartment.
Last night Tull and I saw Wicked on Broadway.. despite having no money we decided to buy champagne and I sang (for travis) Give My Regards to Broadway, in a top hat, high kicking down the stairs with coat tails on. The plot was the story of the two witches from The Wizard of Oz and involved a woman running around stage painted green, attending college with the 'good' witch and a lot of midgets on harnesses flying around the expanse of the room. Despite the clear threat of being sued for taking photos in the program, Tully started snapping away undetected until by accident, the flash went off. A very angry woman in uniform was furiously whispering abuse at her and trying to snatch the camera. So we pretending we had no idea what was going on and Tull 'sneakily' put the camera in her pocket.
Despite it sounding like a freak show, it really was one of the best things I've ever seen.

If I make it to London in one piece Ill update this with a few photos..

x

New York is a friendly town

Sabrina left us in charge of Batman and her apartment while she ran off to San Francisco and her long awaiting boyfriend.
We've been lucky enough to share the apartment with one of her aquaintances from Sydney who likes to 'party' at 4:30am in her room. This wouldnt be an issue except for the fact that we sleep in the lounge room. So the bright lights and clanging of the cat food bowl flying across the room have just been a fucking awesome part of my sleep pattern of late. Not to mention the giggling that occurs when you're intoxicated and think no one can hear you. Everyone can hear you.
We did some partying of our own last week - our first night out in New York consisted of making dinner, having a few beverages and then someone slipping a little something something in my drink. I really enjoyed throwing up in the snow filled gutter, falling in it, and then continuing to throw up after getting a lift home in a limo. It was like the Presets. Minus the Presets.
Aside from that, we all had a blast. I danced off the rest of my night to the entire Vampire Weekend soundtrack back at Sab's apartment (with Sab & Tully) while they took turns in slapping me in the face.
Take two on the partying - Christmas Eve we went out for 'a drink'. With no Sab and no idea where we were going, we stopped the cab in East Village and decided to join a line outside the only club that was open. Some black guy in sunglasses was picking people out of the line and letting them in, Jess piped up that we were Australian and he invited us straight in (No one could see that under our jackets we were wearing the same t-shirts and jeans we'd been wearing for the past 2 days).
We managed to be let into a roped off area and helped ourselves to bottles of vodka on ice. Needless to say Christmas morning consisted of managing to succesfully hold my vomit down. Tully wasn't so lucky..

Christmas day was spent at Josh's apartment in East Village with 11 other Australian's who we'd never met before. Still feeling like we were going to throw up, Tully and I decided it would be rude to say no to a glass of wine to accompany the three hour long game of pictionary. It was nice to not have to listen to the American accent for once, and the weather wasn't below freezing. We could almost pretend we were home.

Lunch was roast chickens, ham, pork, salads, baked potato's, gravy.. enough to feed a small country. I think I was swaying by this point.. sometime it grew dark and Tull and I dragged our sorry arses back home.

A few highlights of the past few days:
- realising I had $36 in my bank account
- Jess and Tull pissing off about 40 tourists by lying on the John Lennon memorial in Strawberry Fields in Central Park
- Dylan's Candy Bar. Oh my god. Everything you can imagine plus more. There were chocolate covered oreo's, grape flavoured gummy bears, cookie dough covered in chocolate, oreo cupcakes.. I now have diabeties.
- Tully's diet of yesterday: coke for breakfast, chocolate brownie, M'Donalds, other chocolate brownie and then a chocolate pop tart for dinner
- walking 80 blocks because we couldn't find the right subway line
- having to tell a giant, glaring, mexican man that he'd short changed me
- getting a free lunch at the Natural History Museum today thanks to CSU Dining Hall tricks of the trade
- making friends with a homeless man who feeds pigeons and said he was going to marry his wife's daughter
- finding out there's a Cindy Sherman exhibition here at the moment
- not seeing Suri Cruise.

I'm in a tourist shop with techno music and fluro lights to keep me company. Time to leave..

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

X O X O

Where we're staying right.... NOW

This is Batman